In the Hands of God

I am Yours and born of You,
What do You want of me?

Majestic Sovereign,
Unending wisdom,
Kindness pleasing to my soul;
God sublime, one Being Good,
Behold this one so vile.
Singing of her love to you:
What do You want of me?

Yours, you made me,
Yours, you saved me,
Yours, you endured me,
Yours, you called me,
Yours, you awaited me,
Yours, I did not stray.
What do You want of me?

Good Lord, what do you want of me,
What is this wretch to do?
What work is this,
This sinful slave, to do?
Look at me, Sweet Love,
Sweet Love, look at me,
What do You want of me?

In Your hand
I place my heart,
Body, life and soul,
Deep feelings and affections mine,
Spouse -- Redeemer sweet,
Myself offered now to you,
What do You want of me?

Give me death, give me life,
Health or sickness,
Honor or shame,
War or swelling peace,
Weakness or full strength,
Yes, to these I say,
What do You want of me?

Give me wealth or want,
Delight or distress,
Happiness or gloominess,
Heaven or hell,
Sweet life, sun unveiled,
To you I give all.
What do You want of me?

Give me, if You will,prayer;
Or let me know dryness,
And abundance of devotion,
Or if not, then barrenness.
In you alone, Sovereign Majesty,
I find my peace,
What do You want of me?

Give me then wisdom.
Or for love, ignorance,
Years of abundance,
Or hunger and famine.
Darkness or sunlight,
Move me here or there:
What do You want of me?

If You want me to rest,
I desire it for love;
If to labor,
I will die working:
Sweet Love say
Where, how and when.
What do You want of me?

Calvary or Tabor give me,
Desert or fruitful land;
As Job in suffering
Or John at Your breast;
Barren or fruited vine,
Whatever be Your will:
What do You want of me?

Be I Joseph chained
Or as Egypt's governor,
David pained
Or exalated high,
Jonas drowned,
Or Jonas freed:
What do You want of me?

Silent or speaking,
Fruitbearing or barren,
My wounds shown by the Law,
Rejoicing in the tender Gospel;
Sorrowing or exulting,
You alone live in me:
What do You want of me?

Yours I am, for You I was born:
What do You want of me?


-- St Teresa of Avila

My Beloved One is Mine

I gave myself to Love Divine,
And lo! my lot so changed is
That my Beloved One is mine
And I at last am surely His.

When the sweet Huntsman from above
First wounded me and left me prone,
Into the very arms of Love
My stricken soul forthwith was thrown.
Since then my life's no more my own
And all my lot so changed
That my Beloved One is mine
And I at last am surely His.

Oh Exceeding Beauty

Oh Beauty exceeding
All other beauties!
Paining, but You wound not
Free of pain You destroy
The love of creatures.

Oh, knot that binds
Two so different,
Why do You become unbound
For when held fast You strengthen
Making injuries seem good.

Bind the one without being
With being unending;
Finish, without finishing,
Love, without having to love,
Magnify our nothingness.


-- St Teresa of Avila

Solemnity of holy mother St Teresa of Avila

"During the 16th Century, Spain was the ruler of the largest empire that the world had yet seen, and all but master of the world. During these years of outward glory, a child was born who would witness by her life that a person’s greatest good is within and won “by giving up everything”. This child became St. Teresa of Avila.

On March 28, 1515 Teresa de Ahumada was born into a wealthy family of Avila, Spain, where she received an excellent upbringing within her pious family. She was a beautiful and lively child, and the favorite of her father. A natural leader, Teresa one day persuaded an older brother to escape from home in order to seek martyrdom from the Moors. Fortunately they were met by an uncle who was riding on horseback into Avila. But the family’s remonstrances didn’t stop her or her enthusiasm for religion and she then got her brother to help her build hermitages from stones.

Eventually, Teresa did escape from home to enter a Carmelite Monastery. She did this with great anguish as she deeply loved her widowed father, yet she felt that she must enter as she felt that that was the best place for her in order to save her soul. Teresa had yet to learn that doing things for love is a higher motive. Yet God did bless her good intention by giving her much joy in her new life. However after some time she felt that she wasn’t serving God enough; she felt He was asking more of her. The Community she entered was very numerous, with much going on. She wanted a poorer, simpler life, where more time would be available for prayer and recollection, where she and a few others would live together with warm charity. She thought that since Our Lord has so few friends she wanted to console him by living her vows truly and with great love; then by thus pleasing Him to ask of Him those graces that would make the leaders of the Church holy. She believed that theologians and priests of the Church are in the forefront of the battle of the Church in the world, and they need many graces in order to defend the Church and lead the people to holiness of life.

Without realizing it, Teresa was being inspired to renew the Carmelite Order, both for the Nuns, and then for the Friars. God gave her an abundance of mystical graces whereby He blessed this work He inspired in her. This reform eventually came to be called the Discalced Carmelite Order.

St. Teresa was asked by her confessors and spiritual directors to write her about her life and her spiritual experiences. She obeyed, and displayed a rare talent for writing - profound, human, warm and witty. She thus bequeathed to the Church a number of great books: the book of her Life, the Foundations, The Way of Perfection, and the Interior Castle. So deeply did she grasp the ways of God and prayer that she has been called Mater Spiritualium (Mother of Spirituality). Teresa was canonized on March 12th, 1622. On September 27th, 1970, Pope Paul VI declared her a Doctor of the Church."

-- From the Carmel of St Joseph in Ontario

Sancta Mater Teresia, ora pro nobis!

Mater Spiritualium, ora pro nobis!

In time of sorrow and trouble...

"In time of sorrow and trouble do not omit your customary good works of prayer and penance; because the devil tries to disturb you so that you will abandon them: but rather increase them, and you will see how soon the Lord will relieve you."

-- St Teresa of Avila

** Photo by Boyer d'Agen

Transverberation of St Teresa

"Amid the other virtues of Teresa, the love of God shone forth with particular lustre. It burned in her heart so strongly that the Confessors of Teresa marvelled thereat, and extolled it as the love belonging to the Cherubim rather than to man. Our Lord Jesus Christ increased it, in a wonderful manner, by many visions and revelations, for one He adopted her as His spouse, giving to her His right hand, and holding forth to her a nail. He moreover vouchsafed to speak to her in these words: Henceforth thou shalt be zealous for my honor like a true Spouse; now I am wholly thine, and thou art wholly mine.

At another time she saw an angel, who pierced her heart with a fiery dart. She herself narrates the vision as follows: 'I saw an angel standing at my left hand in bodily shape. He was not large, but small, and most beautiful in form. Hes countenance was so bright and shining that he seemed to belong to the highest choir of angels, who are all on fire, or, in other words, to those who are called Seraphim. I saw that he carried in his hands a long golden dart, at the point whereof was a little fire. He more than once pierced my heart with his hard, even to my entrails, which he seemed to me to carry away with him when he drew forth the dart, thus leaving me all on fire with the love of God. The pain of the wound was so violent that it forced me to break forth into repeated groans; and yet so excellent is the sweetness to which this intense pain gives rise, that one desires not to be freed from it, and naught is pleasing to the soul save God Himself.'

In consequence of these heavenly gifts, the flames of divine love burned in her heart so strongly that, under God's guidance, she made a very difficult vow. She bound herself always to do that which she should see to be the more perfect, and that which might tend to the greater glory of God. After her death, moreover, she made known to a certain nun, in a vision, that she had died of the unbearable burning of divine love, and not from the attacks of illness. Her heart, which was incorrupt and adorned with the marks of the piercing, was placed in the church of the Most Holy Incarnation, belonging to the nuns of the Order of Barefooted Carmelites in Alba, and it has been venerated down to the present day by the large and devout crowd of Christians who flock thither. All these things having been carefully examined, the Sovereign Pontiff Benedict the Thirteenth, in order to recall the remembrance of this great miracle, permitted the celebration of this feast each year in that Order."

-- From the Bull of Canonization of St Teresa by Pope Gregory XV

** Sculpture in Seville by Romero Zafra.

Teresian Reform

"As we come to treat of the monastery of St. Joseph, founded by Teresa of Jesus on 24 August 1562, it is as well to note that we shall be focussing primarily on Teresa herself, soon to become known as the Mother Foundress. She has reached the mature age of 47, with 27 years experience of religious life at the Incarnation behind her. Moreover her heart has been enriched with a deep and abiding experience of God, and is filled with a plan of living which she is convinced will make it easier for many consecrated souls to achieve that degree of union with God which she has reached herself after many years of searching and suffering. Note, too, that when her followers start to call he Foundress, they do so because they know that it was her creative spirit that gave birth to the communities into which they have entered, though she did so without breaking the continuity and connection with the whole previous tradition of the Church and of Carmel, as the last chapter makes clear.

Without further preamble, then, let us take a brief look at the most significant aspects of this new community which Mother Teresa has gathered round her.

The first important point is that she began this community with four postulants who entered directly from home. They were young, generous, ready for anything and Teresa was ready and willing to guide them in their undertaking and create with them a new community by organising their life in the way most suited to the achievement of their aims.

One aspect of Teresa's charismatic originality was this openness and availability to others; it enabled her to share her own experience with them simply and honestly, attract them by her example and inspire in them the desire to follow her on the path to the heights. Her mission among her own daughters was to help each of them to live in their own inimitable way what she had experienced herself. No amount of historical or theological analysis can give us a clear perception of this basic element. We can bring together all the words of wisdom which she has left us; we can collect quite a number of contemporary testimonies, but we will never succeed in knowing her ag well as any of those young nuns who had the good fortune to spend years in her company. Life is transmitted by living, and living together increases that knowledge which is later so difficult to pass on to others or translate into a set of principles. Nevertheless, in spite of that historical limitation of our knowledge, any effort to get as close as possible to the reality of life at St. Joseph's is justified.

Although Teresa always kept the end in view, and this was the same for everybody, she tried to teach it to her daughters according to the individual capacity of each one of them. Every soul has to live out its adventure alone with God, opposed by the devil and self-love. The search for God begins with baptism and goes on till death. And, since each person has their own particular dose of self-love, and is interfered with differently by the devil, the task of the guide is to show each individual what the right path is for him or her. Saint Teresa tried with all the means at her disposal to help her new companions understand that God is the prime mover, and, that while his ways are too mysterious for us to grasp, he does nevertheless need our cooperation, our effort. We may not be able to help him much, but we can certainly get in his way most effectively.

Those young nuns were quick to realise that Teresa's experience and wisdom were something out of the ordinary. To make sure that neither time nor her absence could remove such a treasure from their midst, they asked her to put her counsels to them in writing. Thus was born "The Way of Perfection" (1565): "This book treats of the advice and counsel that Teresa of Jesus gives to the nuns, her daughters." As if to say: this is what I tell them in our community meetings, in my conversations with them, and indeed whenever a favourable opportunity presents itself. The book was very quickly to become the extension of her personal presence. It was not just another book of theories, but a lived experience shared very effectively with anyone who approached it with an open mind and a desire to learn. While she was alive Teresa continued to teach them; when she died, the book continued to remind them of her teachings.

And so it was that in every new community, even in those founded after her death, Teresa was the real novice mistress. Each novice received her writings, and the appointed novice mistress felt she was there to help St. Teresa out by explaining any point the novice couldn't understand for herself. This aspect, fundamental to the understanding of the importance of the Way of Perfection in the history of Carmel, has caused some to call this book "The Teresian Gospel", and draw the parallel between the way in which the Gospels bring us to know Jesus and the way in which this book leads us to know Mother Teresa.

Bearing in mind then, that this book derives its effectiveness from the personality of its author st least as much as from the ideas it contains, let us recall the dominant themes that run through it, the basic ideas on which Teresa built her teaching in those first years at St. Joseph's - what, in other words, she wanted them to remember always.

They had come together in a humble abode, stripped of superfluous luxuries, few in members, like the apostolic college, to respond to the love of the Lord, to grow in friendship with Him, the better to deal with Him on behalf of their brethren. The whole Church, especially its priests, would be the subject of their conversations with their God-friend; their vigils and care would be for the needs of all souls.

The royal road by which one grew in God's friendship was life of prayer, a life which required three indispensable conditions: love of one's neighbour, detachment from the things of the world - especially from oneself - and humility, defined as walking in the truth.

The principles are only too clear and no one would quarrel with them. But when it comes to applying them in the circumstances of everyday life things are a little more difficult. It is then that the devil and self love let one down. Does the love of our neighbour mean saying yes or no to them? If we are detached from ourselves, do we defend ourselves or remain silent? Does humility mean that we must let our talents fade into oblivion, or, since humility is truth, ought we not make the most of them. The answer to those questions is not always easy; hence the digressions in the book. Every time Teresa remembers a useful experience-- be it her own or someone else's - she writes it down without bothering very much about where it might fit logically. All she is worried about is that when one of the sisters finds herself in a similar situation she will remember the incident and benefit accordingly. The basic ideas will never change, but their applications are limitless. People differ from one another; days vary. But if this treasure is properly assimilated it will always serve a useful purpose.

Teresa's daughters took the orientations she had given them seriously, and soon they found themselves free from care about material things and free of self-love. Recognising their spiritual poverty and helping one another with the sensitivity and sincerity born of true love, they revelled in the peace which Mother Teresa radiated and felt part of the marvellous environment she was creating around her. In other words, St. Teresa was able to create an environment in which people could see a whole new world open up before them, distant horizons to reach out to. (The Teresian novitiate does not so much teach a few things to be practised as set people on a journey, and show them the road they are to travel for the rest of their lives.) The horizon, and indeed the way there, is friendship with God, the Father in Heaven; whose name is to be sanctified, especially when the soul has experienced his Kingdom come within it; whose will is to be done, not from force of habit but deliberately, as long as the short "today" of this life lasts, with the help of Christ's presence in the Eucharist, though he be "so heavily disguised that it is no small torment to someone who has no other love or comfort"; whose forgiveness is obtained by really forgiving one's brethren, and not by penances or good intentions concerning reconciliation; and whose help is the only sure guarantee against the wiles of the devil dressed up as a angel of light, the only freedom from all evil.

The second part of the book is simply a commentary on the Our Father. Anyone who wants to lead a life of prayer cannot do better than follow the way Jesus himself taught.

Obviously, therefore, the Way of Perfection contains some basic ideas, clearly set forth. Teresa wants every novice who comes to her houses to assimilate these, to gradually make them her own in the measure of which she is capable, and to be committed to following this road, with God's help, forever; the novitiate, in fact, never ends."

-- Teresian Carmel: Pages of History by Fr Idelfonso Moriones, ocd

** The Discalced / Teresian Carmel began today, through the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, 448 years ago. Thank you, holy mother St Teresa! And HAPPY BIRTHDAY to all members of the discalced carmelite family!

How powerful before Thee is one sigh

"Alas, my God, if we only knew how great is our wretchedness! If we do not know it, there is danger in everything: therefore it is good for us to be made to do things which show us how abject we are. And I consider one day of humbling knowledge of ourselves which has cost much sorrow and pain to be greater boon from our Lord than many days of prayer: how much more when the true lover loves wherever he is, and always keeps his beloved in mind! It would be a poor thing if prayer could be carried on only in corners. I myself find that I cannot now spend many hours in it. But, O my Lord, how powerful before Thee is one sigh, sent forth from a spirit which is troubled because not only are we in exile, but have not even opportunities of being alone, that we might enjoy communion with Thee!"

-- Foundations by St Teresa of Avila

Serve God in Justice, strength and humility

"It is certain that the love of God does not consist in experiencing sweetness or tenderness of heart but in truly serving God in Justice, strength and humility."


-- St Teresa of Avila

The highest perfection: conformity with the will of God

"The highest perfection consists not in interior favours or in great rapture, but in bringing of our wills so closely into conformity with the will of God that as soon as we realize that He wills anything, we desire it ourselves with all our might."

-- St Teresa of Avila

** Painting by Greg Olsen

Christ has no body on earth but yours

"Christ has no body on earth but yours, no hands but yours, no feet but yours.Yours are the eyes through which Christ's compassion for the world is to look out; yours are the feet with which He is to go about doing good; and yours are the hands with which He is to bless us now."

-- St Teresa of Avila

Have compassion, O Lord, on the creatures thou hast made

"My Lord and my God, how truly hast thou the words of eternal life wherein we may find whatever we stand in need of, if we will but be at the pains of searching for it. But what wonder is it, if we forget thy sacred words, in that state of folly and spiritual misery into which our sins have cast us? O my God, thou Creator of the Universe, in whose presence all that thou hast yet created is no- thing in comparison with what thou art able to create: Thou, omnipotent God, who canst do infinitely more more than I am able to understand, make me the subject of thy infinite power, and grant that thy words may never be effaced from my mind.

Thou has said, Come to me all you that labor and are oppressed and I will refresh you. What can we wish for, what can we ask for more than thou hast here promised us? And why are worldlings lost but for seeking, elsewhere than in thee, for their comfort and repose? Alas, my God, how wretched and blind are those who seek for repose out of thee? Have compassion, O Lord, on the creatures thou hast made: Remember that we are strangers to ourselves, that we know not what we wish for, and that we wander far from the happiness we are in search of. Give light, O God, to souls. We are in a still more deplorable deplorable state of blindness than the man born blind was, whom we read of in the Gospel : for he earnestly wished and prayed for his sight, but we are in total darkness, and are contented to remain so. How desperate, alas, is our condition! Here, O my God, is need, at the same time, of thy omnipotent power, and of thy inexhaustible mercy.

Thou Lord of my heart, and only true God, how great a favor do I now presume to ask thee! It is no other than that thou wouldst deign to love those who do not love thee, that thou wouldst open to those who do not so much as knock, and that thou wouldst afford a cure to those who are delighted with their malady, and who studiously endeavour to encrease it. Thou hast said, my God, that thou didst come on earth, to call sinners. These, O Lord, are in the real sense sinners. Do not have regard to our blindness, but cast thine eyes on the streams of blood thy Son has poured forth for our salvation. Make the light of thy mercy shine forth through the thick cloud of our sinful passions. Consider us, O God, as the work of thy hands, and save us for thy mercy's and goodness' sake."

-- The Exclamations of the Soul to God by St Teresa of Avila

Nothing puts the devils to flight like holy water

"I know by frequent experience that there is nothing which puts the devils to flight like holy water. They run away before the sign of the cross also, but they return immediately: great, then, must be the power of holy water. As for me, my soul is conscious of a special and most distinct consolation whenever I take it. Indeed, I feel almost always a certain refreshing, which I cannot describe, together with an inward joy, which comforts my whole soul. This is no fancy, nor a thing which has occurred once only; for it has happened very often, and I have watched it very carefully. I may compare what I feel with that which happens to a person in great heat, and very thirsty, drinking a cup of cold water -- his whole being is refreshed. I consider that everything ordained by the Church is very important; and I have a joy in reflecting that the words of the Church are so mighty, that they endow water with power, so that there shall be so great a difference between holy water and water that has never been blessed. Then, as my pains did not cease, I told them, if they would not laugh, I would ask for some holy water. They brought me some, and sprinkled me with it; but I was no better. I then threw some myself in the direction of the negro, when he fled in a moment. All my sufferings ceased, just as if some one had taken them from me with his hand; only I was wearied, as if I had been beaten with many blows. It was of great service to me to learn that if, by our Lord's permission, Satan can do so much evil to a soul and body not in his power, he can do much more when he has them in his possession. It gave me a renewed desire to be delivered from a fellowship so dangerous."

-- The Life of St Teresa of Avila by St Teresa of Avila
-o-

Traditionally, in Carmel, usually on Sundays, a sister sprinkles all the rooms, offices and chapels in the monastery. Each cell (bedroom) also contains a vial of holy water so that each sister may sprinkle her cell and anoint herself when getting up in the morning, and in the evening before retiring. Consider keeping a bottle of this sacramental in your home and office, and anoint yourself while making the Sign of the Cross.

St Teresa had great confidence in the power of holy water to ward off evil. You may read more about St Teresa's experience with holy water on Chapter 31 of the book of her life (see column in the left for a link to a free online version).

Commemoration of All Carmelite Souls

I live without living in myself,

And in such a way to I hope,
That I die, because I do not die.

I live now outside of myself,
For I die of love,
Because I live in the Lord,
Who wanted me for himself;
When I gave him my heart,
I placed this sign on it:

I die, because I do not die.

This divine prison
Of love with which I live
Has made God my captive,
And my heart free.
And it causes such passion within me
To see God as my prisoner,

That I die because I do not die…

I wish to reach him, dying,
For so greatly do I love my beloved,

That I die because I do not die.

-- Vivo sin vivir en mí by St Teresa of Avila

-o-
Today we remember all souls who have gone to their rest and belonged to the Carmelite family: those who wear the Scapular devoutly, third order memers, brothers, sisters, nuns and friars. Please remember them in your prayers, that they may enjoy the Beatific vision in the company of Our Lady and the entire heavenly court. Eternal rest, grant unto them, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon them. May they rest in peace. Amen.

Preparing for the fifth centenary of the birth of St Teresa

Motivated in part by Rebecca's post in A Solitary Bird, I would like to invite all readers to join the Carmelite family in studying the works of St Teresa of Avila. The 500th anniversary of St Teresa's birth will be celebrated in 2015 and this would be a great time to read the works that have touched millions of lives.

The Generalate is publishing study guides to help everyone in this new study of her works. The guides also serve for (comm)unity: all Carmelites (and those of other spiritualities as well) are invited to use them. This project should help us deepen our love for Carmel, our understanding and appreciation for the Teresian charism, and it's presence and value in the Church today.

The first book being study is the Book of Her Life. You have one whole year (October 2009 - October 2010) to read this fascinating book in union with the Carmelite family. If you don't own a copy, you may find a free online copy listed under "Carmelite must reads" in the column to the left. Most people prefer the Kavanaugh & Rodríguez translation, but the Peers translation is closer to the Spanish original. It doesn't really matter which one you read - just read it! (Please...)

The study guide for this book, titled I was born for You, may be found here. If you would prefer the document in another language, please let me know and I'll send you the link if it's available.

And switching topics a bit, the Ratio Institutionis for the OCDS has been approved. This is document that deals with the formation program for OCDS. In case you don't have it, you may find it here.

Please pray for me...

Solemnity of St Teresa of Jesus of Avila

Saint Teresa was born in Avila, Spain, March 28, 1515. She died in Alba, October 4, 1582.* Her family origins have been traced to Toledo and Olmedo. Her father, Alonso de Cepeda, was a son of a Toledan merchant, Juan Sánchez de Toledo and Inés de Cepeda, originally from Tordesillas. Juan transferred his business to Avila, where he succeeded in having his children marry into families of the nobility. In 1505 Alonso married Catalina del Peso, who bore him two children and died in 1507. Two years later Alonso married the 15-year-old Beatriz de Ahumada of whom Teresa was born.

Early Life. In 1528, when Teresa was 15, her mother died, leaving behind 10 children. Teresa was the "most beloved of them all." She was of medium height, large rather than small, and generally well proportioned. In her youth she had the reputation of being quite beautiful, and she retained her fine appearance until her last years (María de S. José, Libro de recreaciones, 8). Her personality was extroverted, her manner affectionately buoyant, and she had the ability to adapt herself easily to all kinds of persons and circumstances. She was skillful in the use of the pen, in needlework, and in household duties. Her courage and enthusiasm were readily kindled, an early example of which trait occurred when at the age of 7 she left home with her brother Rodrigo with the intention of going to Moorish territory to be beheaded for Christ, but they were frustrated by their uncle, who met the children as they were leaving the city and brought them home (Ephrem de la Madre de Dios, Tiempo y Vida de Sta. Teresa--hereafter abbrev. TV--142-143).

At about 12 the fervor of her piety waned somewhat. She began to take an interest in the development of her natural attractions and in books of chivalry. Her affections were directed especially to her cousins, the Mejías, children of her aunt Doña Elvira, and she gave some thought to marriage. Her father was disturbed by these fancies and opposed them. While she was in this crisis, her mother died. Afflicted and lonely, Teresa appealed to the Blessed Virgin to be her mother. Seeing his daughter's need of prudent guidance, her father entrusted her to the Augustinian nuns at Santa María de Gracia in 1531.

Vocation. The influence of Doña María de Brinceño, who was in charge of the lay students at the convent school, helped Teresa to recover her piety. She began to wonder whether she had a vocation to be a nun. Toward the end of the year 1532 she returned home to regain her health and stayed with her sister, who lived in Castellanos. Reading the letters of St. Jerome led her to the decision to enter a convent, but her father refused to give his consent. Her brother and confidant, Rodrigo, had just set sail for the war on the Río de la Plata. She decided to run away from home and persuaded another brother to flee with her in order that both might receive the religious habit. On Nov. 2, 1535, she entered the Carmelite Monastery of the Incarnation at Avila, where she had a friend, Juana Suárez; and her father resigned himself to this development. The following year she received the habit and began wholeheartedly to give herself to prayer and penance. Shortly after her profession she became seriously ill and failed to respond to medical treatment. As a last resort her father took her to Becedas, a small village, to seek the help of a woman healer famous throughout Castile, but Teresa's health did not improve. Leaving Becedas in the fall of 1538, she stayed in Hortigosa at the home of her uncle Pedro de Cepeda, who gave her the Tercer Abecedario of Francis of Osuna to read.

"I did not know," she said, "how to proceed in prayer or how to become recollected, and so I took much pleasure in it and decided to follow that path with all my strength" (Libro de la Vida, the autobiography of St. Teresa--hereafter abbrev. V--4.6).

Instead of regaining her health, Teresa grew even more ill, and her father brought her back to Avila in July 1539. On August 15 she fell into a coma so profound that she was thought to be dead. After 4 days she revived, but she remained paralyzed in her legs for 3 years. After her cure, which she attributed to St. Joseph (V. 6.6-8), she entered a period of mediocrity in her spiritual life, but she did not at any time give up praying. Her trouble came of not understanding that the use of the imagination could be dispensed with and that her soul could give itself directly to contemplation. During this stage, which lasted 18 years, she had transitory mystical experiences. She was held back by a strong desire to be appreciated by others, but this finally left her in an experience of conversion in the presence of an image of "the sorely wounded Christ" (V 9.2). This conversion dislodged the egoism that had hindered her spiritual development. Thus, at the age of 39, she began to enjoy a vivid experience of God's presence within her.

However, the contrast between these favors and her conduct, which was more relaxed than was thought proper according to the ascetical standards of the time, caused some misunderstanding. Some of her friends, such as Francisco de Salcedo and Gaspar Daza, thought her favors were the work of the devil (V 23.14). Diego de Cetina, SJ, brought her comfort by encouraging her to continue in mental prayer and to think upon the humanity of Christ. Francis Borgia in 1555 heard her confession and told her that the spirit of God was working in her, that she should concentrate upon Christ's Passion and not resist the ecstatic experience that came to her in prayer. Nevertheless she had to endure the distrust even of her friends as the divine favors increased. When Pradanos left Avila in 1558 his place as Teresa's director was taken by Baltasar Alvarez, SJ, who, either from caution or with the intention of probing her spirit, caused her great distress by telling her that others were convinced that her raptures and visions were the work of the devil and that she should not communicate so often (V 25.4). Another priest acting temporarily as her confessor, on hearing her report of a vision she had repeatedly had of Christ, told her it was clearly the devil and commanded her to make the sign of the cross and laugh at the vision (V 29.5). But God did not fail to comfort her, and she received the favor of the transverberation (V 29.13-14). In August 1560 St. Peter of Alcantara counseled her: "Keep on as you are doing, daughter; we all suffer such trials."

Reformer. Her great work of reform began with herself. She made a vow always to follow the more perfect course, and resolved to keep the rule as perfectly as she could (V 32.9). However, the atmosphere prevailing at the Incarnation monastery was less than favorable to the more perfect type of life to which Teresa aspired. A group assembled in her cell one September evening in 1560, taking their inspiration from the primitive tradition of Carmel and the discalced reform of St. Peter of Alcantara, proposed the foundation of a monastery of an eremitical type. At first her confessor, the provincial of the Carmelites, and other advisers encouraged her in the plan (TV 478-482); but when the proposal became known among the townsfolk, there was a great outcry against it. The provincial changed his mind, her confessor dissociated himself from the project, and her advisers ranged themselves with the opposition. Six months later, however, when there was a change of rectors at the Jesuit college, her confessor, Father Alvarez, gave his approval. Without delay Teresa had her sister Juana and her husband Juan de Ovalle buy a house in Avila and occupy it as though it were for themselves (V 33.11). This stratagem was necessary to obviate difficulties with nuns at the Incarnation while the building was being adapted and made ready to serve as a convent. At Toledo, where she was sent by the Carmelite provincial at the importunate request of a wealthy and noble lady, she received a visit from St. Peter of Alcantara, who offered to act as mediator in obtaining from Rome the permissions needed for the foundation. While there she also received a visit from the holy Carmelite María de Yepes, who had just returned from Rome with permission to establish a reformed convent and who provided Teresa with a new light on the question of the type of poverty to be adopted by her own community. At Toledo she also completed in reluctant obedience to her confessor the first version of her Vida.

She returned to Avila at the end of June 1562 (TV 506-507), and shortly thereafter the apostolic rescript, dated Feb. 7, 1562, for the foundation of the new convent arrived. The following August 24 the new monastery dedicated to S. José was founded; Maestro Daza, the bishop's delegate, officiated at the ceremony. Four novices received the habit of the Discalced Carmelites. There was strong opposition among the townspeople and at the Incarnation. The prioress at the Incarnation summoned Teresa back to her monastery, where the Carmelite provincial Angel de Salazar, indignant at her having put her new establishment under the jurisdiction of the bishop, rebuked her, but after hearing her account of things, was mollified and even promised to help quiet the popular disturbance and to give her permission to return to S. José when calm had been restored. On August 25 the council at Avila met to discuss the matter of the new foundation, and on August 30 a great assembly of the leading townspeople gathered. The only one in the assembly to raise his voice against the popular indignation was Domingo Bañez, OP. A lawsuit followed in the royal court, but before the end of 1562 the foundress, as Teresa of Jesus, was authorized by the provincial to return to the new convent. There followed the 5 most peaceful years of her life, during which she wrote the Way of Perfection and the Meditations on the Canticle.

Foundations. In April 1567 the Carmelite general, Giovanni Battista Rossi (Rubeo), made a visitation, approved Teresa's work, and commanded her to establish other convents with some of the nuns from the convent of the Incarnation at Avila. He also gave her permission to establish two houses for men who wished to adopt the reform. The extension of Teresa's work began with the foundation of a convent at Medina del Campo, Aug. 15, 1567. Then followed other foundations: at Malagón in 1568; at Valladolid (Río de Olinos) in 1568; at Toledo and at Pastrana in 1569; at Salamanca in 1570; and at Alba de Tormes in 1571. As she journeyed to Toledo in 1569 she passed through Duruelo, where John of the Cross and Anthony of Jesus had established the first convent of Discalced Brethren in November 1568, and in July 1569 she established the second monastery of Discalced Brethren in Pastrana.

These foundations were followed by an interval during which Teresa served as prioress at the Incarnation monastery in Avila, an office to which she was appointed by the apostolic visitator, Pedro Fernández, OP. This duty she was loath to assume, and she had much opposition to face on the part of the community. However, with the help of St. John of the Cross, who served as a confessor for the nuns, she was able to bring about a great improvement in the spiritual condition of the community. On Nov. 18, 1572, while receiving Communion from the hands of John of the Cross, she received the favor of the "spiritual marriage." At the request of the Duchess of Alba she spent the first days of 1573 in Alba, and then went to Salamanca to put things in order at the foundation there. At the command of Jerome Ripalda, SJ, she started her Book of the Foundations the following August. On March 19, 1574, she established a foundation at Segovia, where the Pastrana nuns had been transferred because of conflicts with the Princess of Eboli. This marked the beginning of a second series of fonndations. The next was made at Beas de Segura in February 1575. There Teresa met Jerome Gratian, apostolic visitator of the order in Andalucia, who ordered a foundation in Seville. The bishop objected, however, and Teresa sent Ana de S. Alberto to Caravaca to make a foundation there in her name on Jan. 1, 1576, and that of the Seville convent was delayed until June 3 of the same year.

Crisis Between the Calced and Discalced. The entry of the Discalced Brethren into Andalusia was forbidden by Rossi, the general of the order, who opposed Teresa and Jerome Gratian in this matter. The general chapter at Piacenza in 1575 ordered the Discalced Brethren to withdraw from Andalusia, and Teresa herself was ordered to retire to a convent. The general put Jerome Tostado at the head of the Discalced Brethren. While the conflict raged between the Calced and Discalced Brethren, Teresa wrote the Visitation of the Discalced Nuns, a part of The Foundations, and her greatest book, The Interior Castle. The nuncio Nicholas Ormaneto, a defender of the Discalced Brethren, died June 18, 1578, and his successor, Felipe Sega, was less favorably disposed toward them. John of the Cross was imprisoned in Toledo. Against Teresa's will the Discalced Brethren held a chapter in Almodovar on Oct. 9, 1578. The nuncio annulled the chapter and by a decree put the Discalced Brethren under the authority of the Calced provincials who subjected them to some harassment. The King intervened, and four were named to advise the nuncio, among them Pedro Fernández, OP. Angel de Salazar was made vicar-general of the Discalced Brethren while negotiations were afoot for the separation of the Discalced from the Calced Brethren and the erection of a Discalced province.

Teresa then turned to visiting her convents and resumed the founding of new ones. On Feb. 25, 1580, she gave the habit to foundresses of the convent in Villaneuva de la Jara. The brief Pia consideratione, dated June 22, 1580, ordered the erection of a distinct province for the Discalced. On March 3, 1581, the chapter of the Discalced was held in Alcala, and Jerome Gratian, who was favored by Teresa, was elected the first provincial. Teresa's last foundations were: at Palencia and Soria in 1581, at Burgos in 1582; the most difficult of all, Granada (1582), was entrusted to the Venerable Anne of Jesus.

Teresa's body was interred in Alba. Paul V declared her a blessed April 24, 1614, and in 1617 the Spanish parliament proclaimed her the Patroness of Spain. Gregory XV canonized her in 1622 together with SS. Ignatius of Loyola, Francis Xavier, Isidore, and Philip Neri.
Taken from http://www.ocd.or.at/eng/teresa.htm

-o-

* With the change of the Julian to the Gregorian calendar, this date became October 15.
On September 27, 1970, Teresa of Avila was declared the first woman Doctor of the Church by Pope Paul VI.

Holy Mother St Teresa, pray for us!

Transverberation of the heart of St Teresa of Jesus of Avila

"Moses declares in Deuteronomy, Our Lord God is a consuming fire, that is, a fire of love, which being of infinite power, can inestimably consume and transform into itself the soul it touches. Yet he burns each soul according to its preparation: he will burn one more, another less, and this he does insofar as he desires, and how and when he desires. When he wills to touch somewhat vehemently, the soul’s burning reaches such a high degree of love that it seems to surpass that of all the fires of the world, for he is an infinite fire of love. Because the soul in this case is entirely transformed by the divine flame, it not only feels a cautery, but has become a cautery of blazing fire.

It is a wonderful thing and worth relating that, since this fire of God is so mighty it would consume a thousand worlds more easily than the fire of this earth would burn up a straw, it does not consume and destroy the soul in which it so burns. And it does not afflict it, rather, commensurate with the strength of the love, it divinizes and delights it, burning gently. Since God’s purpose in granting these communications is to exalt the soul, he does not weary and restrict it, but enlarges and delights it, brightens and enriches it. The happy soul that by great fortune reaches this cautery knows all things, tastes all things, does all it wishes, and prospers; no one prevails before it and nothing touches it. This is the soul of which the Apostle speaks: The spiritual one judges all things and he is judged by no one. And again: The spirit searches out all things, unto the deep things of God.

It will happen that while the soul is inflamed with the love of God, it will feel that a seraphim is assailing it by means of an arrow or dart which is all afire with love. And the seraphim pierces and cauterizes this soul which, like a red-hot coal, or better, a flame, is already enkindled. For the soul is converted into the immense fire of love.

Few persons have reached these heights. Some have, however, especially those whose virtue and spirit was to be diffused among their children. For God accords to founders, with respect to the first fruits of the spirit, wealth and value commensurate with the greater or lesser following they will have in their doctrine and spirituality.

O happy wound, wrought by one who knows only how to heal! O fortunate and choicest wound; you were made only for delight, and the quality of your affliction is delight and gratification for the wounded soul! You are great, O delightful wound, because he who caused you is great! And your delight is great, because the fire of love is infinite and makes you delightful according to your capacity and greatness. O, then, delightful wound, so much more sublimely delightful the more the cautery touched the intimate center of the substance of the soul, burning all that was burnable in order to give delight to all that could be delighted!"

-- Living Flame of Love by St John of the Cross

St Bartholomew's day: Anniversary of the Teresian Reform

"What with one person and what with another, I had a great deal of trouble in getting the foundation sanctioned. Then there was my patient, and there were the workmen -- for the house had to be got ready very quickly, so that it would be suitable for a convent, and there was a great deal which had to be done to it. My companion was not here, for we thought it advisable that she should be away so that the secret might be the better kept. I saw that speed was of the first importance, and this for many reasons, one of them being that I was in hourly fear of being sent back to my own convent. So many were the trials I had to suffer that I began to wonder if this was my cross, though I thought it very much lighter than the heavy one which I had understood the Lord to say I should have to bear.

When everything had been arranged, the Lord was pleased that some of the sisters should take the habit on Saint Bartholomew's Day and on that day too the Most Holy Sacrament was placed in the convent. So with the full weight of authority this convent of our most glorious father Saint Joseph was founded in the year 1562. I was there to give the habit, with two other nuns of our own house, who chanced to be absent from it. As the house in which the convent was established belonged to my brother-in-law, who, as I have said, had bought it in order to keep the matter secret, I was there by special permission, and I did nothing without asking the opinion of learned men, lest in any way whatever I should act against obedience. As they saw what benefits, in numerous ways, were being conferred upon the whole Order, they told me I might do what I did, although it was being done in secret and I was keeping it from my superiors' knowledge. Had they told me that there was the slightest imperfection in this, I think I would have given up a thousand convents, let alone a single one. Of that I am sure; for, though I desired to make the foundation so that I could withdraw more completely from everything and fulfil my profession and vocation with greater perfection in conditions of stricter enclosure, I desired it only with the proviso that if I found that the Lord would be better served by my abandoning it entirely, I should do so, as I had done on a former occasion, with complete tranquillity and peace.

Well, it was like being in Heaven to me to see the Most Holy Sacrament reserved, and to find ourselves supporting four poor orphans (for they were taken without dowries) who were great servants of God. From the very beginning we tried to receive only persons whose examples might serve as a foundation on which we could effectively build up our plan of a community of great perfection, given to prayer, and carry out a work which I believed would lead to the Lord's service and would honour the habit of His glorious Mother. It was for this that I yearned. It was also a great comfort to me that I had done what the Lord had so often commanded me and that there was one more church here than there had previously been, dedicated to my glorious father Saint Joseph. Not that I thought I had done anything of all this myself; I never thought that nor do I now; I have always known that it was done by the Lord. The part of it which concerned me was so full of imperfections that I can see I ought to have been blamed rather than thanked for it. But it was a great comfort to me to see that in such a great work as this His Majesty had taken me, wicked as I am, to be His instrument. I was so happy, therefore that I was quite carried away by the intensity of my prayer."

-- Life: The Autobiography of St Teresa of Avila by St Teresa of Jesus of Avila

Today we celebrate 447 years of the Reform. "Happy Birthday" to all Discalced Carmelites!